The following was passed along to me by Jack Compton of the Hoos Hoo chapter of BNI here in Charlottesville. This should give you something to start off your week-end.

Spread the Stupidity
Only in This Stupid World
………do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the
Store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in This Stupid World
…… people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in This Stupid World
……….do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters..

Only in This Stupid World
……….do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put
Our useless junk in the garage.

Only in This Stupid World
……… we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in Packages of eight..

Only in This Stupid World

……….do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Why the sun lightens
Our hair, but darkens  our skin?

Why don’t we ever see the
Headline ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?

Why is
‘abbreviated’ such a long word?

Why is it that
Doctors call what they do ‘practice’?

Why is lemon juice made
With artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who
Invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of
Day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn’t there
Mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn’t Noah
Swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the
Needle for lethal injections?

You know that Indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?
Why don’t they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don’t sheep
Shrink when it rains?

Why are they called
Apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of Pro,
is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so Safe,  
why do they call the airport the terminal?

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